When Jonah got up this morning and told me that when he woke up he had to pick the crusty gunk from his eyes he said, "Mom, I think maybe bad mouth germs cause this."
I said "Uh, whaaaaa...?"
"That gum we bought yesterday says it has a Defense System which fights bad mouth germs. So I should probably have lots of that gum for a while."
That, folks, is what you get when your kid learns to read. Also, fielding such questions while driving as, "Mom, what does x-y-l-i-t-o-l spell?"
Evan can stand one tall drinking glass on a cardboard box and then invert a second tall drinking glass on top of the first one and balance them rim-to-rim. I mentioned the "glass" part, right? He's gifted, I'm sure. However, he cannot hit a bucket when he upchucks his last drink of water.
Have you ever cared for a feverish, snotty, goopy-eyed baby while you have a fever yourself? It's easier to stay warm all night that way.
Also, have you ever tried to get ready for a long trip with three children, for which you are leaving in 6 days, while also fighting various and sundry illnesses in said children? Loads of fun for everyone!
And what's this I hear about more bad weather heading for the Pacific Northwest (where I, and my gooey children, are also headed)? Hey, to all that family I'm going to visit, howsabout we go spend the two weeks in Hawaii instead, huh?