Monday, November 2, 2009

Five Stages of Grief; Insomnia Edition

I miss Sleep. I really do. We used to have good times, Sleep and I.

1. Denial
"Hm. Sure am tired this morning... I really should get to bed earlier. Maybe I woke up sore because my neck is out. Maybe I should see the chiropractor."

2. Anger
This morning, as I lay in bed awake again at some unearthly hour, I thought about getting up and vacuuming. I thought about turning on the light and reading. But I was too mad. I was angry. I just wanted some sleep, drat it! I won't give It the satisfaction of actually using this awake time when I SHOULD BE SLEEPING! Raffa-muffa-sniga-frigga! I thought about getting out my Reflexology book or my Homeopathy book to try to find a solution, but I was too mad. So I didn't. I just continued to lay there and seethe. (And that sure helped, let me tell you. Huff.)

3. Bargaining
This is where I'm at now. Drinking games, baby! I'll take a bottle of something cheap --whiskey, rum, vodka; doesn't matter. Anything'll do.-- to bed with me and every time I roll over, I take a shot! Be out in no time, I tell ya.

4. Depression
Okay, so I might be a little depressed about it as well.

5. Acceptance
This is where I remember my Dad being. He'd just get up and read all night long. He got lots of reading done that way. It was just what he did.

I may be there sooner than I thought. So instead of an "empty chair," I'll sit there and look at my empty pillow...


  1. bendaryl9diphenhydramine) it will knock you out. not necessarily suggesting you take it every night but it will get you some rest. If your sensitive use less 25 mg will knock you out so you could maybe use 12.5 in that case liquid childrens. you will get sick and with the flu going around sleep deprivation is not cool.
    This may be connected to the hormone issues.
    The other thing to look at it is caffeine do you indulge in that?

  2. No caffeine, probable hormones.

    Benadryl and similar things usually knock my body out but not my mind-- I feel sleepy but don't actually sleep, and they make me feel ill.

    Last night I had a strong alcoholic drink and some hops tincture before bed and I actually slept better than I have in weeks. So I guess that's a step in the right direction...

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